Sometimes you take the long route because you don’t want to drive through the municipalities. So you have to leave home early, or get somewhere late, because you take side roads instead of the main street. Because you know that that street in particular is a hot spot for cops. For me, being poor, not always being able to have your car registered, or afford to get certain things done… you know you’re going to get pulled over. There’s no way to avoid it. So you just kind of hope and pray, and it’s a pretty nervous and anxious way to live, because you have to get to work, or you have to get to school; but you also know you can’t afford to take care of some of the things that are required of you for your car. And so simply going to school can be scary because you don’t want to get pulled over. You won’t be able to afford to pay the ticket. And so you take the chance and hope you don’t get pulled over. But it’s scary. It’s scary that, day after day, just trying to go to school… to be worried about, “Will this be the day I get pulled over, will this be the day I get caught?”
At one point, I had four warrants because I couldn’t afford to get car insurance, I couldn’t afford to get my car registration, and pay my property taxes. So I would end up having to drive illegally, because my plates would be expired, and I couldn’t do anything about it. So I would get pulled over, and I would explain this to the cops, always, because you would hope that the cop would be understanding. But, they would always give you a ticket. You can’t afford to pay the ticket, because if you could, you would’ve gotten your car taken care of. So you end up not being able to pay the ticket, and then you get a warrant.
Once you get into that cycle, it’s really, really hard to get out of because there are a lot of fees. You can try to get a lawyer. Or you can post bond. If you get pulled over and you can’t post bond, you just do time served.
For me, I did end up getting arrested. Luckily for me I worked at a church that was willing to get me out. I was prepared to just stay in jail, be transferred to the different municipalities, and just do time served, which probably would have been weeks because it was several tickets. So I was stuck in that cycle, and still working to get out of the cycle.
I still have two. There’s an organization, Better Family Life, who has an amnesty program, and they will allow you to get a voucher and you can go to the courts and pay whatever fine the court has, and they will lift the warrant. In my case, I have Maryland Heights and Ferguson left. Maryland Heights actually doesn’t have a fee, so I just have to go up there and get it lifted. But Ferguson, of course, does have a fee. So I have to come up with that money, which I don’t have. And I have about a month to get it done. And if not, then it goes back to normal, back in the cycle again. It’s $100. I’m going to say specifically for me, but when I’m talking about myself, understand I’m also talking about communities of people who don’t have that money. And their family doesn’t have the money. So I could call my family and ask to borrow money, but I won’t end up with a $100 at the end of the day because everybody’s trying to make ends meet. And so you have to make a choice:do you pay your car note? Do you pay your car insurance? Do you take care of the things that you finally got together? Or do you pay for this warrant and then end up not having car insurance and end up in the cycle all over again because you’re going to get pulled over, and you’re going to get another ticket.
The reality is that the $100 that I may have in my bank account has to go to other necessities –rent, food. For me, and people like me, and who come from my background and the communities that I come from, we have to make a choice. And usually, we’re going to choose to eat. We’re not going to starve, so that we don’t get locked up. And some people have said, “Why not catch the bus?” Maybe I catch the bus to school, but I run the risk of not being able to catch the bus back home. Or maybe I’ll catch the bus to work. But I get off so late, that I have to sit at the bus stop for two hours. That’s not safe. It’s easy for someone in a more privileged mind frame, or privileged background, to say, “Just pay the money” without taking the time to understand – we ain’t got it. Let’s just be honest. I don’t have it. It’s frustrating. Especially when people look you in the face and say, “Why not just catch the bus?” or “Just borrow the money.” If that was an option, I would’ve done it. So clearly, it’s not an option.
The way police officers treat us, as citizens, as people, as human beings, is something that needs to be screened better. I think consolidating the municipalities won’t change that. They have to actually change the training and the screening, and look for I guess psychological ways that people view specific people of color. But in my situation with the tickets, I think it would help, because I won’t have five tickets, and five warrants, I’ll have one. One fee. And that will help with the cycle. It won’t be a cycle. It’ll be one ticket that you deal with that one time, versus five, because I got pulled over just going up the street. Twice. Because I ran through two different municipalities.
It’s a bit shaming to have to go to different courts and deal with this, and to have a fear when you’re driving around of being arrested because you have warrants. Then when you actually get to the courts, or try to interact with the courts, some of them are just downright rude and disrespectful. The first thing you do is you call, and find out, “How much is bond?” That’s the first thing you’re going to do, and this is before you get arrested. So you want to know, how much do I need to pay in order to get the warrant lifted? And when I called, for example, Ferguson, specifically, the lady gave me the fee, which was $200 some-odd dollars in order to get the warrant lifted. And I asked her, “What would the process be if I don’t have the money? And what would the process be if I do have the money?” Because I didn’t know. And she basically said, “Well, if you don’t have the money, you’re going to get arrested.” It was very cold and heartless. It was not understanding my situation at all. When I asked her, “What are my options?” She wasn’t helpful:mad attitude, kind of rude, not answering the question. Just, “Pay us or get arrested” was the gist of the conversation. No matter how I rephrased the question, no matter how I tried to get more answers, I even said, “Do I need to get a lawyer?” she said, “That would be pointless. It’s just more money you’ll have to pay.”
There are so many people like me, and worse, who don’t have the opportunity to exercise their voice. And there is a name behind their ticket. And there is a story behind our names. So it’s easy to hear a person who has multiple tickets in multiple municipalities and assume that they’re irresponsible, or assume that they’re lazy. And usually that’s not it. They’re just having a hard time and they have no idea how to get out of it. So they get stuck. There are people that I know of who have seven, eight warrants, and they’re stuck because you’re talking about a bond for each warrant that is over $200. So you’re talking about $1,000 or more just to get all your warrants taken care of. They don’t have it. We don’t have it. And we’re silent and we complain about it at the kitchen table, but I think that it’s time to let everybody know that it’s an issue. It’s an issue. And unless the people who make decisions, the lawmakers, are willing to make some changes, like consolidation – so instead of eight warrants, it’s one – there are always going to be communities of people stuck in a cycle. It’s time to say something. It’s time to say something and not be ashamed of it anymore, not be afraid to say that “It’s our reality,” and try to use our voices to try to make something happen that can change it.
I’m trying. I’m not sitting around waiting for a handout. I’m trying. Growing up in the inner city, I’m trying to be better than what the system says I should be. When it comes to the tickets, I’m trying to get them payed off. I’m trying to get them taken care of. I’m fighting. And so I want people to know you can’t look at my name, look at my ethnicity, look at the background I grew up in and assume anything about my character, my life, my intelligence. Because I’m fighting everyday to be a better me. Not a better girl that grew up in the ‘hood, but a better me. Why do I fight for what I fight for? Why do I fight for Black Lives Matter? I think about the generation after me, and how if my uncles, who sat around and talked about municipalities, or when I think about the conversation you hear in your community, if people got up from their tables and actually went out and demanded change, that maybe things could have been a little different for me. Our grandparents and our great grandparents fought for that. And somewhere down the line we stopped fighting. And I wonder if we kept fighting, if things could have been different for me. So I fight, and I do interviews, and I speak because just maybe my kids, or those who are a generation after me, maybe I can change something for them so that when they’re my age they’re doing a different type of interview.
When it comes to the court system and ticketing and the way that it’s done, I would like to see alternatives to tickets because I think giving a ticket to a family who couldn’t afford to get certain things taken care of on their car is pointless. It’s going to go into warrant status and they’re not going to be able to pay it. You’re not doing anything by giving them a ticket besides making their lives so difficult and so stressful when it’s probably difficult enough to make ends meet. I would like to see alternatives. What can we provide these families with instead of a ticket? And maybe that’s programs where families can work and do community service, and at the end of that service their property taxes are taken care of, or their plates are renewed, or something like that rather than a ticket. Actually, I want to see the justice system working with the community saying, “This is something that we require of you, but I know that right now you can’t do it. So what can we do? How can we work with you to get that taken care of?” Otherwise, the cycle’s just going continue because these are poor people that just don’t have the money.
Whole households feel the impact of that because the mother is taking her children to school, or whatever other activities they may have. So it’s not just affecting one individual. That decision is affecting the household, and even beyond that it’s affecting the general trust that the community has with the court systems that they live in. If the expectation is that if you’re caught with something not being right in your car or with you, you’re going to get a ticket. And they’re not going to work with you, not going to care about what you have going on in your home. Why would I trust you? Why am I going to call you when I need you? Because I can’t even trust you to work with me on something as simple as this.